How To Spice Up Your Relationship This Christmas

 

Christmas is more than jollof and chicken and decorations.

A lot of noise accompanies Christmas in Nigeria. There’s traffic, family visits, chicken that must be killed, Detty December paparazzi and expectations flying around. In the middle of all that, it’s easy for romance to take the back seat. But if

you’re intentional, this season can actually bring you closer.

Forget matching pyjamas; here are a few great ideas to help spice up your relationship (or marriage) and deepen your intimacy this Christmas. 

 

1. Start With a Private “Us Day” Before the Family Takes Over

Before you both travel to your homes or everyone starts showing up unannounced, create a day that belongs to just the two of you.

Take a day off. Stay indoors. Order food or cook together. Wear something comfortable but attractive. Play music. Talk. Nap. Touch. Laugh.

This kind of intentional isolation helps you reset emotionally and physically before the exhaustion and excitement of the season drain you both.

2. Get Creative and Thoughtful with Gifts

If you search online for Christmas gift ideas for couples, you will find many recommendations for personalised gifts, but gifts don’t always have to be material. Sure, material gifts are great; they’re like keepsakes that keep memories alive and fresh. 

But understanding your partner deeply is the key to giving a great gift: knowing what they need at the moment and what makes them happy. If your partner is a 9-5er, a staycation where they can unwind without work or family pressure might get you a 10/10 score over a customised piece of jewellery or a Miu Miu bag. 

To choose between an experiential and material gift, consider your partner’s needs and how the year has treated them so far.

 

3. Plan a Romantic Christmas Date Night At Home

Who says dates have to happen outside? There’s too much happening outside, and you both may have attended many, but indoor date nights are where intimacy is rekindled. To get your cosy indoor dinner date idea right, you must set the mood:

• Low lights or candles
• Soft music
• Phones away
• Intentional conversation

 

4. Turn Small Traditions into “Your Thing”

You don’t need matching pyjamas or a professional photoshoot to feel connected. Create small, personal Christmas traditions:

·         Cooking Christmas food together (even if one person is just supervising or serving ‘tea’)

·         Watching old Nollywood classics or your favourite Christmas movies

·         Exchanging handwritten notes instead of expensive gifts

·         Share wishes, goals, or intentions for the next year on the eve of Christmas. 

These little rituals give your relationship something to look forward to every year, and that emotional anticipation is powerful.

5. Bring Back Playfulness (Yes, Even as Adults)

Sometimes, what a relationship needs isn’t a deep conversation but laughter. Adulthood can be exhausting, so take a chill pill and have fun.

Play games. Dare each other. Share fantasies, jokes, and memories. Dance together in the living room. Be silly. Be flirtatious. Reserve the seriousness for the oversabi (know-it-all or excessive) aunties and uncles at home.

6. Surprise Each Other

Surprises don’t have to be grand. A sticky note with a loving message, a little gift left in their pocket or bag, or a DIY couple-themed advent calendar with small treats, love notes, or mini experiences can bring a smile to your partner’s face and make them feel cherished.

7. Play Dress Up for the Holidays

Coordinating outfits, even subtly, can be a fun way to show unity and get into the holiday spirit. Whether it’s matching sweaters or socks, it adds a playful touch to everyday moments.

Host a themed Christmas night just for the two of you. Get into your fantasies and play them out. 

8. Take Care of Each Other

Taking care of each other rolls quality time and acts of service into one. It deepens your bond and intensifies your love for each other. Help them with a task, cook for them…

Holidays can be hectic, and family drama can drive you to the edge. Make time to listen, reassure, and support each other through the chaos.